Why Do People Hug? A Photographer's Perspective from the Dance Floor
At the end of my most recent wedding (one I'd been trusted to make one of the most important of my 36 years) I asked the couple, Sean and Samantha, for a quick selfie. Instead of a stiff pose, they pulled me right into a hug.
It's a small moment. But it's one I think about a lot, because it happens more than you'd expect. After a full day of ceremonies, speeches, and candid shots, it's often the photographer who ends up in an embrace, not just the guests.
So why do we hug in the first place?
Physiologically, it's simple: touch releases oxytocin and lowers cortisol, the stress hormone. That's part of why a hug at the end of a wedding day feels like an exhale... for the couple, it's often the first moment all day where the adrenaline settles and it actually sinks in that they're married.
But there's more to it than biology. A hug is also a statement of inclusion. When a couple pulls their photographer in for a hug instead of a handshake or a smile-and-wave, they're saying something specific: you weren't just here to document this, you were part of it.
That's not something I take lightly. My whole approach,
shooting only one event a weekend,
being present for
the full arc of the day rather than parachuting in for the highlights — is built around exactly that kind of trust. You can't fake your way into a genuine hug at the end of the night. It has to be earned over hours of showing up, staying out of the way when needed, and caring about getting it right.
So the next time you see your photographer at the edges of the dance floor, camera in hand, know this: if the day goes the way it's supposed to, by the end of it, we're not just capturing your story. We've become a small part of it.
The consultation is free. The memories are forever.
